Hhhh :'

Kali ini gatau harus gimana

Mungkin kalian yang suka ngeliat blog gue ini, bakal bilang gue ini orangnya suram banget

Hampir semua post gue isinya tentang G.A.L.A.U

Tapi ini susah kawan!

Penyesalan emang selalu datang terlambat

Gue tau lo udah sama dia sekrang

Tapi ini sakit coy!

Ga! Gue ga nyalahin lo – sama kayak post gue yang sblmnya.

Gue ga akan pernah nyalahin lo.

Karna itu hak lo buat milih jalanin sama dia.

Lagian, gue juga emang ga pantes sama lo kan?

Lo terlalu baik buat gue.

Gue kayak orang yang kemakan omongan gue sendiri (lagi)

gue sayang sama lo setelah lo udah ga ada perasaan apapun sama gue.

kalo denger cerita temen gue tadi, jujur gue sangat amat ga bersemangat.

gue langsung lemes. dan ......... hhh :'

mungkin agak lebay, tapi itu yang gue rasain.

gue tau lo udah sama dia. gue coba buat move on. 

tapi ga segampang itu.

kalo orang-orang bilang lo nge-PHP-in gue

mereka salah

karna mungkin ini balesan buat gue, yang dulu sempet terlihat ngelakuin itu juga ke lo. walaupun sebenernya bukan gitu maksud gue.

kalo orang-orang bilang, gue cuma buang-buang air mata gue

buat lo yang blm tentu mikirin gue,

mereka juga salah.

mreka - bahkan gue - ga ada yg tau mungkin dulu ini yang lo rasain waktu gue ga meduliin lo.

bahkan mungkin lebih sakit.

hhhh :' gue gatau harus gimana lagi

gue sayang sama lo.

sangat amat sayang. 

plis jangan jauhin gue :(

Tayor Swift - Back To December

I'm so glad you made time to see me.
How's life? Tell me how's your family.
I haven't seen them in a while.
You've been good, busier than ever,
We small talk, work and the weather,
Your guard is up and I know why.
Because the last time you saw me
Is still burned in the back of your mind.
You gave me roses and I left them there to die.

So this is me swallowing my pride,
Standing in front of you saying, "I'm sorry for that night,"
And I go back to December all the time.
It turns out freedom ain't nothing but missing you.
Wishing I'd realized what I had when you were mine.
I'd go back to December, turn around and make it all right.
I go back to December all the time.

These days I haven't been sleeping,
Staying up, playing back myself leavin'.
When your birthday passed and I didn't call.
And I think about summer, all the beautiful times,
I watched you laughing from the passenger side.
Realized that I loved you in the fall.

And then the cold came, the dark days when fear crept into my mind
You gave me all your love and all I gave you was "Goodbye".

So this is me swallowing my pride
Standing in front of you saying, "I'm sorry for that night."
And I go back to December all the time.
It turns out freedom ain't nothing but missing you,
Wishing I'd realized what I had when you were mine.
I'd go back to December, turn around and change my own mind
I go back to December all the time.

I miss your tanned skin, your sweet smile,
So good to me, so right
And how you held me in your arms that September night --
The first time you ever saw me cry.

Maybe this is wishful thinking,
Probably mindless dreaming,
But if we loved again, I swear I'd love you right.

I'd go back in time and change it but I can't.
So if the chain is on your door I understand.

But this is me swallowing my pride
Standing in front of you saying, "I'm sorry for that night."
And I go back to December...
It turns out freedom ain't nothing but missing you,
Wishing I'd realize what I had when you were mine.
I'd go back to December, turn around and make it all right.
I'd go back to December, turn around and change my own mind

I go back to December all the time.
All the time.

belom siap~

gue belom siap.
belom siap kalo lo harus pindah.
belom siap kalo lo harus pergi.
belom siap dan belom siap.

tapi gue gapunya hak buat ngelarang lo pindah
yang bisa gue lakuin sekarang cuma berdoa, supaya sebelum lo pergi, kita bisa tetep sahabatan kyk dulu lagi.

lo tau? miris dan nyesek banget
tiap kali gue liat lo deket sama sahabat lo itu.
nyesek. karena dulu itu tempat gue.
miris. karena sekarang gue gabisa sedeket kayak dulu lagi sama lo.

hmm penyesalan emang selalu dateng terakhir.
gue yang dulu sia-siain semuanya. sekarang malah pingin kayak dulu lagi.

jujur, kalo bisa milih, gue maunya perasaan gue ke lo itu cuma kayak sahabatan deket.
tapi gue ga bisa milih.
dan jujur aja, gue sebenernya capek setiap kali gue liat lo gue harus inget semua kejadian selama 3 hari itu.

ini bukan salah lo.
gue juga ga bermaksud nyalahin lo dan buat lo jadi ngerasa bersalah.

ini salah gue. gue terlalu berlebihan nganggep semuanya.
mungkin ini emang saatnya gue ngerasain apa yg lo rasain 2 tahun yang lalu.

hmm, kalo lo baca ini, gue cuma mau bilang:
makasih buat 3 hari itu. makasih udah pernah percayain gue sebagai temen curhat lo dulu
makasih karna selama 3 hari itu lo mau jadi sahabat terdeket gue
makasih buat setiap perhatian lo ke gue (walaupun lo mungkin ga pernah ngerasa ngelakuin itu)
makasih buat semuanya...